You think you know someone and then “bam!” They come along and surprise you. Sometimes, the things you learn can be a real shocker, but in the arena of life storytelling you can also discover pleasant surprises and gain invaluable lessons, too.

It’s a funny thing—and perhaps you can relate—that I used to think “knowing” someone was about gathering their stats—where they live, what they do, and other common identifiers. But a more genuine and richer appreciation goes beyond a resume.

As a sucker for good stories, I’m eager to listen to those told on the radio. Shows such as “The Moth,” “This American Life” and “StoryCorps,” lure me in, and I’m transcended to a world outside my own, made relatable by shared feelings.  

Given my love of story listening, I suggested to my daughter Alexandra that we create a storytelling game. Together (specifically with tons of her creativity and effort), we came up with “Tell Me Another (TMA).”

TMA is a fun game of strategy, but the best part is hearing stories from family and friends. There is laughter and surprise, and each time I walk away with an enriched understanding of those I thought I knew best!

Experiences shared connect us in an incredible way. But if you really want to grow in wonder and awe, here are five extraordinary lessons you can learn by listening to the stories of others:

1.       Resilience is comprised of small, diligent steps. For my son, the TMA prompt was, “When something was so terrible that it became funny.” He spent three years living in South Africa while serving in the Peace Corps. When we played TMA, I heard stories of his experience that I didn’t know at the time (probably for the better), which revealed his incredible resilience during difficult times.

2.       Others deal with struggles you do not realize. My nephew’s TMA prompt was, “When ______saved my life.” I knew he had a chronic health issue, but I had no idea of the extent of his monthly treatments. He is so kind, gentle and generous that I could hardly imagine him suffering so. His attitude, I learned, is truly an inspiration.

3.       Courage is contagious. My daughter’s TMA prompt was, “When I felt bravest.” I knew that in her young life has had many chapters, but I didn’t fully appreciate how she worked through feelings of fear—and a dwindled savings—to reach her current successes. I walked away proud and inspired.

4.       Honor the pace of storytellers. My daughter-in-law’s TMA prompt was, “When I moved from my hometown.” I can’t retain details normally, but when she tells her stories they are rich with the most incredible kind. She speaks at a relaxed rate, which allows me to pay deeper attention and soak in every word. Her voice and storytelling are soothing. I learn by remaining silent and paying attention to her observations, which are always remarkable.

5.       Disappointments provide opportunities. My TMA prompt was, “When I got my diver’s license.” I tried to get my license when I was 16, even though I didn’t own a car. I got in a bit of practice in my parent’s car, however, and felt bold enough to go in to take the written and driving test.

After I passed the written exam, I went out for the test drive with the officer at the DOT. We buzzed along, and he told me to make a left turn. As he said this, I realized I was going too fast but decided to turn anyway, lumbering straight up onto someone’s front lawn.

It was an almost movie-classic bit of mishap since the owner was out watering his flowers at the time. The home owner turned to us, surprised, and witnessed the car lurch up over his curb onto his grass before we stopped.

The DOT officer turned to me and calmly told me to back off the lawn, and I proceeded to return to the office, where he announced I didn’t pass.

I didn’t try getting my license again until I was in college and about 20 years old. In hindsight, NOT owning a car and driving in high school was great, because I was able to pay for trips to Spain and Mexico instead, which were essential life experiences.

As we all hunker in during these times of COVID-19, stories can hold us up and remind us that we are resilient, capable, and a community. And we will always benefit from sharing stories together for connection, laughter, and inspiration.

If you’re looking for a storytelling game to play with friends and family, please check out Tell Me Another at Storied Gifts Shop.

Sherry is the founder of Storied Gifts a personal publishing service of family and company histories. She and her team help clients curate and craft their stories into books. When not writing or interviewing, Sherry spends loads of time with her grandchildren and lives in Des Moines, Iowa.

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The shop is a mother and daughter venture for Sherry and Alexandra Borzo of Content In Motion. They both work to help their client's stories sing. The shop is their effort to inspire a focus on healthy minds for everyone through positive thought.

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