I remember oh-so-well when our kids left home as young adults. It was about the same time for the two of them, and I was in my mid-40s. I felt excitement about a new chapter along with the melancholy of realizing doors were closing. My child-bearing and formal child-rearing days were over, and the next things to come were both thrilling and frightening.
Adventures since then have met and exceeded everything I imagined, and I’m grateful. And, as is natural, my husband and I continue to enter into even newer life phases that come with growing older. There is more time for personal interests, the glories of grandparenting, and facing unexpected changes in health. These are the new frontiers for us: the first medication for blood pressure or cholesterol, the first chronic condition diagnosis, and a changed relationship with food and what we eat.
What’s a person to do when life keeps changing, especially if the changes are challenging? I say that the best strategy, the one that affords the most pleasure, is to lean in and own the change!
Coined by author Sheryl Sandberg, the phrase “lean in” comes from her book of the same title addressed to women about balancing motherhood and careers. But the idea of this “head down” and dogged focus applies for anything in life, because life will keep twisting, turning and even careening to the point that it’s easy for us to feel like we have no control.
If we resist the change, we are destined to feel the pain of fighting against it. On the other hand, if we nestle in and get curious about our new circumstances, we can find the adventure of the present as we flow with the currents of inevitability
THE PRESENT IS GUARANTEED
To be mindful and in the present is tough. I know I’ve had a long-standing issue with “dog-brain,” much like the character Dug in the movie Up. I’ve been easily distracted by “squirrels” and many times have missed out on enjoying life as it’s happening. But no more! So long as I breathe, there is the opportunity to improve.